Status: Single

I am just a typical christian lady. My desire is to wait on God in everything and do things His way. This mindset led me to confidently choose the profession and the kind of life I am now living. I fully believe that I am in the middle of God’s will. However, has life been always that smooth and easy? Wasn’t there any points of tension and pressure, where my will collides and contradicts with His will?

Among all the aspects of my life, there is one area where I usually keep my mouth shut. Not because I have nothing to say about it; but because I intentionally evade the question, “How’s your love-life?” There it is. There is no more hiding. I am just as preoccupied as the rest but is just pretending to be fine.

So what’s the big fuzz about it? Why am I acting so? Let me share to you something more about my self.

I am a single christian young adult. And let me add more words to that, I am single since birth, popularly called, “No Boyfriend Since Birth” or NBSB. Growing in a christian home and environment, being single wasn’t so much of attention during my teenage years. My family and friends were ever supportive and even commended me for keeping my head on school and not on boys. As a result, I ferried well in school. Most of the times I got the grades I needed and wanted. I garnered a number of victories that has given God the glory and honor and my parents pride and willingness to support me in my pursuit of a Medical Doctor degree. I could say that I am a pretty successful and blessed young adult until something happened. I turned twenty-five.

So what’s with this age? This is the stage where I am at now and the time when almost all the people around me are telling me to find the one I want to spend the rest of my life with. Or maybe start looking and observing, or open my heart’s door to someone. So, my heart, that was once quiet and tranquil was disturbed by the thought of having to at least date someone.

I started searching but at the end of the day got hurt and discouraged. No one, I suppose, has ever considered me in their list. Or no one has ever thought of me. Or no one likes me at all. Or worst, everyone hates me – that they would not even dare to search my heart and see what good is there.

This thought left me lonely and afraid. I was led to believe in the lie that has broken the hearts of many ladies, “I am not that beautiful to be admired.” Everything got physical believing that every guy around me are after the outside beauty of the flesh.

However, the Lord who is Love did not leave me comfortless. His truth as my Creator gave peace to my weary heart, “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvelous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.” [Psalm 139:14] Being reminded that God is my creator is freeing. It gave me a sense of worth and meaning. It tells me that a perfect God does not make anything less than perfect, that an excellent Potter like Him does not do a second rate job. His handiworks are excellent, and I am one of the zillions. So instead of self-pity, I waved goodbye to loneliness and shame; and said hello to happiness and contentment.

 

My search of the scriptures did not end there nor was the hand of God. I was led to a conclusion that a servant never worries when her master is her Father. With God as my master, I need not worry whom to date and when, whom to spend the rest of my life with,a and who will love me and want me. He has apportioned for me an amount of love which He alone knows the purpose thereof. If He tells me to pour that love to someone worthy, I would lovingly and willfully love with all that I have to offer; but if He tells me to pour that love to Him alone for His work to finish, I would with all my heart and soul.

Staying single for the rest of my life may sound lonely and painful. But I know that God will meet my needs. He will open ways and means to make my soul glad in His service. For me, nothing is of greater value than to partake of the sufferings of Christ. Apostle Peter says, “But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ’s sufferings; that, when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.” [1 Peter 4:13 KJV]

I rejoice in the Lord for this life that He has blessed me with. This moment of singleness is a specially-appointed time for me to know Him more and have more of Him for the life ahead. There is no more tint of sadness, only radiance of joy coming from a heart fully surrendered to His sovereign will.